Episode #28: Honoring Childhood and Adult Sensitivity Through Healing, Play, and Presence

Reclaiming joy, safety, and connection for highly sensitive children and adults with family and registered play therapist Angelique Foye-Fletcher.

Welcome back to The Happy HSP Podcast. In this episode, I’m joined by Angelique Foye-Fletcher. She’s a licensed therapist who works with highly sensitive children, adults, and families through play, presence, and neuroscience-informed healing. We talk about how early experiences shape our relationship with vulnerability, and why play isn’t just for kids but can also be a powerful tool for deeply feeling humans at any age.

If you’re a highly sensitive person who wants to know more about how presence and play can create safety both in our relationships and within ourselves, then this episode is for you.

I hope you enjoy it!

Kim: Angelique, thank you so much for joining me today. It’s great to see you.

Angelique: Thank you. Thank you. I’m glad to be here.

Kim: So how did you find out you were highly sensitive and what was that journey like for you?

Angelique: Wonderful question. So, I found out when I was in the middle of my graduate school experience, so I was pursuing a master’s program, master’s in child development, family studies, and we’re just kind of reading about our family systems and who we are as individuals. And I stumbled upon this term “first trauma,” then ACES, adverse childhood experiences, and then next it was highly sensitive empath. I’m like, that’s me. That’s me. So that’s how I stumbled upon it, just through my journey in graduate school.

Kim: So, what kind of things did that bring up for you? What was it like to read about that and what did it make you think about?

Angelique: What brought up as I think most of us, and I am not going to speak for all, but I would say all, it kind of consolidated a lot of experience I had as a child. So, for example, it brought up feelings of shame. It brought up feelings of acceptance, a feeling of belonging. Like, okay, this, I’m not the only one as a highly sensitive empath. I knew I was empathetic, old soul. All the words we hear old soul wise beyond your years, all those kinds of things. And then I recognized like, oh, I also heard the rhetoric of you’re too sensitive, you need to toughen up. So, it was kind of both a joy and a grief experience I had once I really understood that term.

Kim: Wow. That’s so funny. When you were saying that it made me realize too that I feel like the word empathic is accepted. People are supposed to be empathic and caring, but sensitive is not so much and isn’t there a….

Angelique: It’s a juxtaposition. It’s like you can be sensitive but not too sensitive. And I remember Jason Wilson, who’s a wonderful, wonderful author and talks about the man, the myth, the demands, talks about black men’s experience with feelings and emotions. He talks about how when we hear the word vulnerability, which I also see was sensitive, that means we’re more susceptible to threat. That doesn’t mean, oh, it’s actually sometimes seen as a good thing. It’s like, no, you’re more susceptible to threat.

So, I think that we grew up in a society, what he was saying, as well as our well-meaning parents are trying to toughen up our kids so they’re not susceptible to any threat, whether that’s bullying, whether that’s being seen as othered or being othered. And I thought that was a really great way of understanding what that actually means with the sensitivity piece. Right.

Kim: Yeah. So, we’re almost taught not to be vulnerable because like you said, our parents though well-meaning they probably want to protect us. But what would you say that does to us as a society or as kids when we’re taught that vulnerability is unsafe?

Angelique: Honestly, it goes back to the implicit biases we all hold, which is that mental shortcut we hold to help either to perceive something as a threat or something as pleasurable. And so, a lot of times our parents, family members and well-meaning folks are like, okay, I want to make sure that you are feeling safe and protected to any perceived threat. And what that says about our society is we’re always on looking out for anything that’s perceived as a threat versus something that’s perceived as a gift or something positive. Because it goes back to just how we started in this world as cavemen. You get eaten or you eat, right? So, we’re not so far away from that when I think when it comes to that kind of rhetoric.

Kim: Yeah, I’m so with you, and it’s funny listening to you talk about this too. It’s almost bringing up things as highly sensitive people we are probably seen and can feel more at threat. So that would make sense that we kind of bury the vulnerability and build those walls to protect ourselves.

Angelique: Right. Even though we look at patterns and we understand that’s an interesting thing about steep feeling kids now adults or deep empaths. It is like, no, I’ve seen this pattern before. I can recognize, I remember reading about the experience of a highly sense of empath, of I can see things or feel things that others can’t.

So, there’s a tone that maybe a person may have that other people may not just pick up on. But if you grew up in an environment where it was like maybe there was constant threat, yelling, screaming, having to be hypervigilant about people’s moods and shifts, right? So, when to be vulnerable and not be vulnerable, but then you grow older and you realize, okay, why am I feeling the Sunday scaries? Yeah, I get that email, I get that ping, and I’m like, whoa. And it’s the same feeling you have when you had a parent or a coach yell in your face as a kid and your brain can’t decipher that sometimes. Yeah.

Kim: What would you say vulnerability is and how can we use it in beneficial ways? Sorry if I’m getting so deep here, but I find the idea of vulnerability.

Angelique: I think this is part of what we do as HSPs, right?

Kim: Yeah, yeah. I think everyone’s like, oh, I know how to be vulnerable, but then when you go there, it’s really uncomfortable. And that’s something I’m kind of going though in a relationship now, so I’m curious your thoughts and feelings on that.

Angelique: Oh man. Oh, you put me on the spot. No, it’s all good. It’s funny, we know all the Brené Browns of the world and Esther Perel and everyone’s reading their books and they’re like, okay, vulnerability is this. And I honestly, if I had to just put it in layman’s terms, it is just the ability to feel deeply and to not be so afraid of exposing that sense of deep feeling or thoughts. And then when we think about in the broader terms, in a macro level working with, I personally don’t like using the terms vulnerable populations.

It should be historically oppressed, historically marginalized, you know what I mean? But when we use those terms, it goes back to this is a population of folks included. We think about children, women who are pregnant, those in prison and institutionalized those with mental health, ongoing chronic mental health illnesses. There is vulnerability because there is a little bit, again, that perceived threat of like, will this person mean harm with their intention to care for me?

Kim: Wow. Yeah. That’s too huge.

Angelique: It may have been two different things, my brain kind, so I apologize.

Kim: No, not at all. I think that’s an awesome thing to think about it because I was thinking about it more relationally, but you’re so right. People in general, in the population that can also be described as vulnerable. There’s different ways to see it. It’s not just here or there. There are levels.

Angelique: And I think relationally one-on-one would be just the willingness to open, to uncover.

Kim: That’s hard. And when you say the Brené Browns of the world, and it’s so easy to take those bite-sized messages, but when you’re really showing up in relationships with vulnerability, it’s way harder than it sounds. I think that takes practice.

Angelique: It does.

Kim: Sharing what’s really on your heart without worrying how you come across, I mean, yeah.

Angelique: It does practice. It takes courage and bravery and you do it scared, anyway.

Kim: Yeah, I’m so with you. So, tell me about your work. You work with children or is it adult children? How this came about for you, because you said that a lot of the high sensitivity realizations came from your childhood. Was there a connection there for you that you wanted to help people heal part of this self or did you just kind of fall into this type of work?

Angelique: Kim great question, and it’s kind of a two-parter because I am a former no deep feeling kid who’s now the deep feeling adult helping other highly sensitive parents reparent themselves as they’re working with their kiddos and teens.

Kim: That sounds like such a beautiful mission.

Angelique: It is. It is. And so being able to, my goal, my mission, my calling is I want to help those with deep feelings. Understand that you’re seen, you’re valued, you’re supported and loved fully, authentically as well as you have an opportunity to have calmer mornings, have safer relationships, have more effective communication.

I think sometimes what gets crossing the wires between highly sensitive parents who are trying to reparent themselves as well as trying to help the kiddos with the same feelings is that it comes out in forms terms of, they’re right. I hear that term a lot or difficult temperament or sensitive, very susceptible to more sensitivity. There’s a lot more sibling rivalry or they’re having issues with anxiety or they’re really struggling with perfectionism. And guess what? That deep feeling parent also struggles with that too.

And so, I want to be able to provide a space for parents, caregivers of aging parents, medically complex kids, maybe parents with complicated relationships with that older parent, and they need a space to process.

And I also work with kiddos, kids and teens using utilizing play therapy, sand tray, walk and talk. And I also see couples. So, it’s kind of like my lane is never just, I’m a play therapist, right? Because plays for everybody.

Kim: I was going to ask you about that, but that’s just for the kids or the adults too?

Angelique: It’s both.

Kim: Yeah.

Angelique: It’s a collaborative process. I invite you have to invite the parents as part of the play process entering the world of the child. Dr. Gary Landreth, who’s the founder of Play Therapy, stated that birds fly, fish swim, kids play. And so, I have an opportunity from my own childhood recognizing that I was deep feeling kid who grew up a little too fast kind of understanding, having to feel the need to feel the adults in my life, well-meaning loving, but also having their own emotional challenges. And I was sometimes made to feel like I have to manage those feelings, and I can say that my mom’s listening, sorry.

Kim: You did your best.

Angelique: Doing the best she can, my grandmother. But I recognize that I was a deep feeling kid who probably needed some time processing and understanding my sensitivity is a superpower, and with superpowers, with great responsibility comes great strength. So that, that’s been my calling. And the joy revenge is saying even despite the moral decay of our society and the moral distress and all the things that’s going on, the act of being joyful as adults or kids and kids, teens, older folks, whatever, is a way to deal with that.

Kim: An an act of rebellion.

Angelique: An act of rebellion, active of loving rebellion, healthy rebellion.

Kim: We’re expected to not love ourselves. We’re expected to not prioritize joy and work ourselves to the bone. So, share with me play joy. What part of that is useful for us in terms of therapy and living our lives? What does play do for us?

Angelique: Great question. It’s I’m almost talking to a parent client who comes in and they’re like, what’s this play therapy about? Am I just watching you play with my kid? And I do that all the time. No, play is an invitation. Play is an egalitarian relationship where you’re, I’m entering the child’s world and it’s a sense of freedom. The four therapeutic positive play would say, I see you. I hear you. I’m here. I feel you. That’s what it does. And dare I say the deep feeling parent also wants to be seen, wants to know I am here, wants to know that I feel them and then I hear them.

That’s what play can provide. What I utilize is child-centered play therapy. So, it’s a non-directive approach, meaning I’m literally narrating what the kid is doing in therapy. Sounds silly. It sounds like a sports commentator, like, okay, he’s running the ball, he’s doing this. You know what I mean? But what I’m saying to little Timmy, we always use a little Timmy example. Little Johnny maybe Janisha.

What I’m saying. What that looks like is maybe they’re playing in the sand tray and they’re picking up a figurine or something like that. And so, as the adult, I’m sitting with them, not above them, not in a chair observing, but sitting on the floor with them, looking at how they’re creating their world.

And so, I’m saying things like, oh, you’re picking up that sand tray. You’re very curious. Oh, sorry, you’re freaking up that tiger. You’re very curious about the tiger. Now you’re placing it in the sand and now you’re kind of looking around and figuring out what to do next. Oh, I noticed a tree over there. All the things. So, I’m using the tone, I’m soft, I’m engaging as well as just being there with the child.

And that child could be like, whoa, I feel seen. Whoa, they’re actually here with me. And I equate that Kimberly to an adult sitting in a conversation with another adult who is responding, empathic listening. It’s intoxicating. You ever have a conversation when your so and are so deep and you’re so engaged and it just feels like they get it? That’s the same exact feeling that that kid is having as I’m repeating what they’re saying.

Kim: Right? Not only are you mirroring what they’re doing back to them, but you’re showing that you’re engaged, you’re showing that you see them and that you’re present with them.

Angelique: I’m attuned to them emotionally attuned.

Kim: And what does that do for them?

Angelique: It gives ’em a sense of feeling supported and seen and also provides them sometimes for other kiddos, especially sensitives, those who are a little bit more sensitive can feel like this is uncomfortable. I’ve had examples of I’m so used to the adults in my life kind of checked out, not really engaging, not even showing interest for whatever reason.

And so now I have this adult who’s sitting with me, being with me that it feels a little bit vulnerable. I feel exposed. And what I would say for the child who is in play, especially non-directive and some directive play therapy, which is more using books and tools and stuff like that, more interventions if you will. I really do think it just provides the child with a lens and language to what emotions they’re feeling, what skills they can use to cope with said emotions.

How I look at play as part of my four pillars of healing, and so the four pillars of healing, which is encompasses in this brain piece, I really do believe that people really value not only the emotions and the woo, but they also want neuroscience. And I’m a neuroscience geek myself, so you want to know, okay, what exactly are you doing to help? So, play actually increases your thought process, your logical process with your prefrontal cortex, which is the front part of your brain. That’s the thinking brain. We call it the limbic brain, which is the middle part is your emotions. That’s where it’s a lot of stored in. And typically when we’re feeling a little bit anxious, feeling nervous or stress, the front part of our brain shuts down.

Kim: Right.

Angelique: It’s like, I’m done. I got to use all resources right now. I can’t. I can’t. So, I’m going to go into my limbic brain, which is all the memories stored. That’s when you start to see your kid melt down. That’s when you start to see them struggling. That’s when you see them kind of just literally collapsing because they don’t know what else to do. And then there’s a little that back of our brain, which we call the amygdala or the alarm system that tells our brain we’re not safe. We call it the four T’s to trauma. We know about the, sorry, four F’s, I apologize. Fight, flight, freeze, and fawn.

And so, for the listeners who may be familiar with fight, fight, freeze, the fawn response is when you overcompensate, when you people please, when your perfectionism, that’s that part because you’re saying to yourself, I don’t feel safe, so how can I appease the threat? And so, what play does is unlocks all those parts of the brain in a safe, meaningful, authentic way for the child. The child can’t sit on a couch like us adults and just cognitively take in. Yeah, have you thought about washing your hands under the water? What does that make you feel? They’re not going to say they’re going to be like, well, and if a kid does that, that’s…

Kim: That’s amazing. Yeah. How’s your personal growth lately? Well, yeah, they don’t have the words for that yet. That makes sense.

Angelique: They don’t have the words for it yet, and literally as young as three and five, they don’t have the emotional language. So, my job is to teach that through play.

Kim: Through play. Now, what about adults in play? What kind of play do you encourage for adults? And I’m guessing that does the same thing kind of unlocks your brain from the four Fs that you mentioned?

Angelique: Yes, yes. So, what that looks like for adults is interesting, and I love this question because part of my other platform is reclaiming joy for adults. All adults should be able to reclaim joy through play. And so, what that typically will look like for an adult in my room is like I invite them to play with some fidget toys, some fidget tools, something sensory based, because that unlocks that part of the brain that feels, I would say not so much the thinking brain, but more that memory brain.

They kind of feel like, okay, I have something to touch, something tangible. Maybe I have a sand tray, and invite them to just rub their hands through the sand. Because when we think about the scientifically is at the beach or out at the lake near water, very calming, very relaxing, or that’s why we have this big push and things with millennials trying to get their revenge back on their childhood, playing with the, having covering books, adult coloring books.

So, I even invite and have use scented markers so it can engage in all your senses as you’re coloring and talking and connecting, because a lot of times adults, especially those who maybe are experiencing later diagnosed neurodivergent, may have a hard time looking, how do I say this? Have a hard time looking, engaging with someone. So, it’s like I invite them to say, I know that you can look down, because that’s the way your brain can process. Or maybe you’re a verbal processor, but you feel it is your first session ever and you don’t know what to say. So, I invite you to use play toys to help feel a little bit more soothed and calm. Some people may use say that creative arts therapy, or sorry, creative art therapy, I just say play.

Kim: Yeah, and you’re making me think too, people that do things with their hands, create with their hands. There’s got to be something to that that just kind of lets the world kind of fall away and all the ruminating that we do and just kind of get in that zone where you’re just being, you’re just…

Angelique: The flow state.

Kim: Flow state, and just experiencing yourself on a different level. We get so stuck in our heads.

Angelique: So, using Play-Doh, using bubbles, even, I remember I did a video, a quick little TikTok video of me being on my smoke break, but instead of smoke break using bubbles to blow, because what it’s doing is I’m getting oxygen to my brain seeing bubbles dissipate. I can say, oh, those are all my thoughts and I’m popping each one away. And the adult can, again, you have to invite them. If they’re not into it, that’s fine, but just maybe having it available in the room to show that it’s accessible is helpful.

Kim: What would you say you struggle with as a highly sensitive person? What do you find challenging about your trait?

Angelique: The biggest trait challenge, I would say area of growth, if you will, is I feel everything, and therefore, what I feel is what I think and think what I feel. When it’s not necessarily that maybe I feel overwhelmed in the moment, but it’s just a moment. And I sometimes cannot catch myself, say, Hey, it’s just a moment moving through it. You’re allowed to have these emotions. They don’t define you.

And that leads into sometimes my creativity. I am a very, very loving being creative. I’m more of the, I love building websites, you know what I’m saying? Creative interventions in the moment with kids, that kind of thing. But when it comes to, oh, taking out an art canvas and just paint just to paint,

It’s like, no, it has to be perfect. It has to be based off some prompt. You know what I’m saying? It can’t just be the act of just doing, and I know some listeners on here probably feel that way. It’s like, no, I have to have a goal, a design. I have to, I can’t just paint the wall. I feel like it or something like that, or, yeah, I struggle with that sometimes.

Kim: Yeah. It’s like things that we want to do just for fun sometimes having a serious end goal for it kind of…

Angelique: Thing. Right. Purpose driven all the time. Yeah, totally.

Kim: Sometimes the things that you do don’t have to have a specific intention. So with you there, what do you love about the trait and what do you celebrate about your sensitivity?

Angelique: What I love and celebrate is, I mean, I am the work. My clients are the work. I am the work, I guess the best way I can describe it, being a highly sensitive empath, a deep feeling kid has tremendous amounts of benefits, especially in the world when there are a lot of uncaring, unfeeling people, some in leadership, some in terms of corporate and in our workspaces and places and stuff. And I love and honor and celebrate just the joy I have in knowing exactly the deep capacity that I hold for all my emotions.

Kim: And oh, how much we need that more today. Just the love, the empathy from everyone.

Angelique: And being authentic, I think fully. That was always something I struggle with. I guess that’s another trait was that I celebrate now is very much being authentically imperfectly perfect, right? I’m authentic, who I am as I am loving me, who I am as I am loving myself, who I am as I am understanding that these feelings, the sensitivity is a way of being and feeling connected with others that may feel dare I say, too much. You ever heard that your feelings are too much, you’re too much. You’re thinking too deeply. You know what I mean? And you’re like, why are you not? This is a big deal.

Kim: Think about it more deeply than you are.

Angelique: And there’s other times where I got to take things too serious, right?

Kim: Yes. Oh, totally.

Angelique: Whereas there doesn’t have to be that it ain’t that deep. You know what I mean?

Kim: Yes.

Angelique: It’s a balance.

Kim: Just lighten up. I feel like that highlights another point. We can be so hard on ourselves to do and interact and be everything so perfectly.

Angelique: More like we saw on Instagram the curated, coiffed very much, even as someone, yeah, they’re wearing makeup after they give birth to their child, and it’s like, what the heck? And no shade. No. You know what I mean? If you have the time and the energy to do that, because beauty is important.

Kim: Sure. Makes you feel good.

Angelique: That’s a value for others. I just think this is a very, there’s transitions and times in life where it’s like, okay, we just got to be raw and uncut, and I show up like that in my sessions all the time.

Kim: That authenticity is so important. And I feel like, I don’t know, maybe it’s my awareness, but I’m kind of getting the sense that people are getting back into that corner because things have been kind of surface level and faked for so long and people are, I hope.

Angelique: Think so. Yeah.

Kim: But I’m with you. The videos that show a transformation where they start and then they show you the end result, but it’s like, yeah, but that took five years and you’re seeing it in 30 seconds. That’s not real life.

Angelique: Our brain, we have the capacity to only hold less than six seconds of information. So of course you want to be both informative and entertaining. And this blew my mind when I knew some influencers would just rent out Airbnbs and make it seem like that’s their home. And you’re like, this big kitchen, this oven, there’s all these things. And so again, as a highly sensitive impasse or something like that, am someone who really craves authenticity and I love storytelling and all the lot and stuff. I also have an allergic reaction to, I call it allergic reaction, to things that just feel disingenuine.

Kim: We pick up on that. We’re like…

Angelique: And I’m very justice oriented in fairness, you know what I’m saying? So, it’s like this don’t feel right. It don’t look right.

Kim: Doesn’t match up.

Angelique: Match up. It doesn’t match up with the pattern that I’ve already come up. So, it’s all the things.

Kim: Yeah, you’re in this fancy Airbnb, but at home you have a pile of dishes.

Angelique: Oh, you must be at my house. I have pile of dishes.

Kim: What advice would you have for HSPs who may be struggling to find joy in their lives? What would you say?

Angelique: I am reminded of this quote that I love. I learned about this four years ago from another HSP therapist friend of mine, and I might be butchering the name of the Japanese author who wrote this book on the male loneliness pandemic in Japan in the 80s. So now we’re seeing what’s going on years later in America. But he shared this quote that said, “life is pain, but suffering is optional,” and we can’t have joy without suffering or grief. I’m not going to sit here and say, because what it teaches us is the power of presence. Joy teaches us to be present in the moment to know that suffering is an option now in terms of overthinking something over and over and over. That’s what I’m saying, not suffering in the grand scheme of, I’m not trying to be tone deaf here. Poverty. You don’t know when your next meal is and stuff. That’s great.

Kim: Yeah, I hear you. It’s what we use to torture ourselves with.

Angelique: Correct what is the rhetoric we grew up with that we no longer ascribe to, but yet it plays automatically, unconsciously, subconsciously. That is, and I will say this because my platform is helping parents out and kids is the inner critic is also the voice of your parent, that highly critical parent or teacher, and may not be the voice, but somehow you learned it from that time, and now you embodied it as an inner critic, as a times when you’re just having a human moment humaning and you’re saying, you’re so stupid. Why did you do that? Why did you say that? Now, no one’s going to like you. They’re going to find you out. Right?

Life is pain. The pain point was growing up in a highly dysfunctional, whatever, low emotional household, emotionally volatile household, I will say that’s something that was inevitable, right? It was hard. You can’t really, can’t pick your parents, all that kind of thing. But the suffering from it afterwards, when you become an adult and you learn and try to, or at least try to unlearn those thoughts, negative core beliefs.

Kim: Those loops, those things, we keep telling ourselves.

Angelique: Those loops.

Kim: The stories that we have in our heads about who we are and why we do the things we do. Yeah.

Angelique: I truly believe everybody has a story, and I love listening to those stories. That was my superpower as a highly sensitive empath. And those out there who struggle is like, listen to your body, listen to your cues, listen to your needs. You use that for others. Use it for yourself.

Kim: Yeah. Honor your own needs and the way that you do as others, and again, it’s a practice.

Angelique: You can rewrite your story, but you have to also acknowledge the pain. One cannot accept unless you have great acknowledgement for the suffering that you have experienced and that the inner child in you is looking for you to be the adult that needed to protect them.

Kim: Oh, I love that so much.

Angelique: Be safe with them.

Kim: Acknowledge your pain, honor it, see it, but don’t hold onto it. Don’t let that be your story. Don’t let that be your loop.

Angelique: Yeah. And also, it’s a yes and yep, you can recognize that is the loop. I am susceptible to it when I perceive a threat and letting go of, why do I always jump to that? I thought I did my healing. I thought I did the books and the reading and the podcasts, and I’m still stuck in that trying to find my voice, whatever that is. Because us HSPs also are hard on ourselves too, when we thought we’ve done all the self-improvement and the processing, you know what I’m saying? Emotional processing.

Kim: Yeah. It can feel like such a setback when it’s like, no, it’s another chance to be kind to yourself and keep going.

Angelique: Exactly. Exactly. You get it. I feel like I’ve known you.

Kim: That’s such a beautiful message, and I feel like it’s something that people need to hear more of because it’s something we all struggle with. It’s something we all struggle with, and no one has it together, and no one has all the answers. We’re all learning and growing, and I just feel like that’s the name of the game.

Angelique: Learning and growing. I love that. Be a teacher as well as a lifelong student.

Always understand that you have to challenge discomfort. Sorry. You have to challenge your comfort in order to have some sense of growth because again, pain is inevitable, suffering is optional, and some people don’t even want to, can’t even fathom the thought of challenging what is comfortable for them, even though it’s causing them great suffering.

Kim: I know, and it’s sometimes, and we’re all on our own journeys and you can’t fix others, and we got to focus on ourselves.

Angelique: Of course.

Kim: It is hard to see someone suffer so much when you’re like, gosh, if you could just face it for a minute…

Angelique: For a minute.

Kim: Face the pain and really let it go, then you don’t have to carry it. So, there’s a difference.

Angelique: And that’s why it’s important for me, again, with the healing process, I know it doesn’t come in a form of, okay, I’m ready to come to therapy, I’m ready to unpack and do all the things for adults and kids. It sometimes it’s in the forms of the four pillars, which is using nature-based therapy. So I love walk and talks. So we literally go outside and walk and use senses and say, tell me five things you see four things, you hear three things you can take that kind of thing just to get presence, get in your body. A lot of us kind of float, don’t know what’s going on, so let’s just walk and talk through that. Because the bilateral stimulation we have, which is just the movement of walking back and forth, back and forth, front backwards, whatever is helpful and talking helps unlock the brain.

The second one is through connection. So understanding how I can have a connection with myself and with my child or my teen, because a lot of times people come in there because they have a disconnect. They don’t have that felt sense of belonging and deeply. And we are, as Brené Brown sounds, we are deeply wired for connection. And so as a licensed married and family therapist, I understand that I specialize in relationships. I specialize in how we can set healthier boundaries so we can set peace, have joy in those relationships and those connections. And the third piece, sorry about my cat meowing, if you can hear that…

Kim: Mine’s hopping around too.

Angelique: Yeah. The third piece that I really love, I talked a little bit about already was play. Play is, play is powerful, play is freeing. And last but not least, the power of books, reading other people’s stories and narratives. So then that way you can, I mean we all learn from, again, being a teacher, being a student, we have to learn.

Kim: That’s beautiful. It’s like a mix of learning and reading and that knowledge building, but also the immersing and the connection. There are different levels to all of this, and it’s so important with the connection and all of it together. It’s kind of…

Angelique: That’s right. That’s right.

Kim: So, tell me, you mentioned before a little bit of the joy, revenge, but you have a book list. Can you share what that is and where people can find that, the joy, revenge?

Angelique: Yes. So, the Joy Revenge book list is, as I alluded to be an escape artist as Trisha Hershey, who’s the author of The Nap Ministry, which I love, rest as resistance. Her book is on that list. So, to answer your question, the Joy Revenge book list is on my website for fletchertherapy.com, and you’re able to download by sending a new email and getting updates about how to evoke joy, have a healthy rebellion act of getting joy. And there are books from authors that I love and I give to all my clients to read as part of their journey of healing.

Kim: Wonderful. So people can go to your website to find that. And also, information on your therapy packages, I’m guessing you have?

Angelique: Have. Yes. I have three therapy packages. One is Reconnect and Rejuvenate. So that’s just a really curated list of, you get five sessions. One is walk and talk. Obviously those who live in Kansas, Missouri, or do virtual talks as well as getting that PDF book list, an individualized plan. Second is parent support and play therapy package. So, people like it’s a la carte, right? It is an opportunity for folks to say, okay, this feels like I’m putting a financial investment in. I’m putting the time in, and this is exactly what I’m going to get. And so I kind of have that. And last one at least is healing the inner child series. So take a look.

Kim: Beautiful.

Angelique: See what fits you.

Kim: Other than your website, where can people follow along on your journey? Are you on social media?

Angelique: Yes. Yep. You can find me on Instagram Foye Fletcher Therapy. You can also find my page on Facebook and I’m on LinkedIn.

Kim: Amazing. Well, thank you so much for joining me today. I appreciate your time.

Angelique: Thank you. Thank you. I had a really wonderful time. 

Thank you so much for listening in on my conversation with Angelique. I hope it reminds you that when it comes to healing, presence over perfection is key.

I’d love if you could share this episode with someone who could use these words or leave a review to help more HSPs find this show. It’s a quick and easy way to spread the awareness and support that comes along with our shared experience and understanding.

Until next time. Take care!

About Angelique Foye-Fletcher:

Angelique R. Foye-Fletcher is a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist and Registered Play Therapist based in Kansas City, Missouri. She is the founder and owner of Foye-Fletcher Therapy LLC, where she helps overwhelmed parents, children, caregivers, and families reconnect with their needs, heal from generational patterns, and rediscover joy through play, connection, nature, and story.

As a highly sensitive and neurodiversity-affirming clinician and educator, Angelique blends warmth, directness, and cultural humility in her work. She specializes in play therapy, parenting support, anxiety and emotional regulation, relationship healing, and burnout recovery. Her approach is grounded in her four therapeutic pillars — _Connection, Nature, Play, and Books — _which shape her mission to make emotional wellness practical, creative, and accessible for every family she serves.

Angelique has been featured as a mental health expert on Great Day KC, FOX 4 KC, and KMBC, and has presented for organizations such as the Mental Health KC Conference, Johnson County Library, and local school and community programs. Through her private practice, workshops, and collaborations, Angelique continues to bridge clinical insight with everyday tools that foster growth and connection.

Follow along on Angelique’s journey:

• Website: foyefletchertherapy.com

• Instagram: @foyefletchertherapy

• LinkedIn: linkedin.com/in/afoyefletcher

• Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/p/Foye-Fletcher-Therapy-61577289801782/

• Email: angelique@foyefletchertherapy.com

• Psychology Today: https://www.psychologytoday.com/profile/1525783

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About Kimberly:

Kimberly Marshall is a career coach for highly sensitive people (HSPs) and host of The Happy HSP Podcast. After 20 years in the publishing industry working for companies like Time Inc., Monster.com, and W. W. Norton, she left her corporate career to pursue work that better suited her HSP needs. She now helps HSPs overcome burnout and low confidence in the workplace and create gentle and nurturing careers that bring them lots of purpose, meaning, and joy. 

Through her work and creative ventures, Kimberly hopes to shed more light on the reality of living with high sensitivity and inspire more HSPs to embrace their empathetic, loving, and gentle natures.

• Hosted/produced by Kimberly Marshall

• Edited by Fonzie Try Media

• Artwork by Tara Corola